Self-Love: Happy National Masturbation Month. There’s a holiday dedicated to just about everything, but we were extra pleased to learn that May is National Masturbation Month, with National Masturbation Day falling on May 28. And what better way to celebrate than to share some of our best tips to maximize self-love? We’ll discuss the holiday’s origin, as well as explain why we should all make masturbation a priority.
Why was National Masturbation Month created?
According to The San Francisco Standard, National Masturbation Month was born in San Francisco. Activist and author Carol Queen, who is also the staff sexologist at SF sex toy shop Good Vibrations explained that the holiday was created in 1994, after Surgeon General Dr. Joycelyn Elders was forced to resign from her position when she shared her sex positive views, advocating for self-pleasure. The crew over at Good Vibrations was outraged by her ousting and declared May National Masturbation Month as a response to the conservatives who eliminated Dr. Elders from her role. Now, the holiday is celebrated all over the country, with groups and leaders promoting the importance of talking about masturbation openly.
What are the benefits of masturbation?
Masturbation is normal, healthy, and actually has a ton of benefits! In fact, studies have shown that masturbation can:
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Reduce stress
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Improve sleep
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Relieve anxiety
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Boost your mood
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Increase focus
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Prevent depression
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Alleviate pain
When your masturbation session ends in orgasm, your body releases hormones like dopamine and oxytocin. Both hormones increase positive feelings and emotions, while contracting the stress hormone cortisol. But the good news doesn’t end there. Masturbation can have positive long-term benefits too. Research suggests that men who masturbate regularly may have a lower risk of prostate cancer, while women may experience relief from menstrual cramps, less vaginal dryness, and even higher self-esteem. All the good stuff!
How often do most people masturbate?
Solo sex reports vary, but according to recent research, women reported masturbating about eight times per month, and men reported 15 times a month on average. And while people of all ages participate in self-pleasure, according to the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, for adolescents and those over 70 years old, masturbation is more common than partnered sex. The advancements in sex toy technology have also helped increase the amount of masturbation sessions. About 70% of sex toy owners in the US say their sexy accessories have helped improve their pleasure.
How can I improve my self-pleasure?
There are lots of ways to make solo sex more fun–here are some of our favorites.
1. Prioritize YOU time.
First things first, put yourself first! Life is busy and full of demands, and it’s easy to keep bumping your own pleasure down the list. But here’s the truth—when you intentionally carve out time for yourself, everything else flows better too. Stress levels drop, focus improves, and your overall mood lifts.
Think of your solo time as essential self-care, not a luxury. Put it on your calendar if you need to! You deserve moments that are just for you, no apologies.
2. Lube up.
Never underestimate the power of a good lube—especially a CBD-infused lubricant. CBD can seriously up your pleasure game by promoting deeper relaxation, enhancing blood flow, easing tension, and heightening sensitivity. Plus, extra moisture makes everything feel better, from gentle caresses to more intense play.
Our favorite tip? Warm a little CBD-infused lubricant between your hands first to really awaken your senses before touching yourself. Your body (and mind) will thank you.
3. Set the mood.
Just because it’s a solo session, doesn’t mean the vibe doesn’t matter. Light a candle, make the space comfy, and maybe even wear something extra sexy. The more you lean into creating a sensory experience—sight, sound, scent, touch—the easier it is to let go, be present, and tap into deeper pleasure.
4. Explore New Territory.
Self-pleasure is an incredible opportunity to learn your body without any pressure. Try different kinds of touch: slow, fast, firm, feather-light. Explore new erogenous zones you might usually skip over. Maybe introduce a new toy or try edging (bringing yourself close to orgasm, then backing off, to build a more intense climax). There's no "right" way—only what feels good for you in the moment. Let yourself be curious and playful.
Whether it’s during National Masturbation Month or any other time of year, self-love should be normalized and celebrated. The more we talk openly about it, the more we break down old taboos and create space for healthy, shame-free pleasure.
We’ll leave you with a powerful reminder from Dr. Raegan McDonald-Mosley, Chief Medical Officer at Planned Parenthood Federation of America:
“Masturbation is a normal and common activity for both men and women, yet many people feel shame or guilt about masturbating. Negative feelings about masturbation can threaten your health and well-being. Remember, only you can decide what is healthy and right for you.”
Here's to making self-love a beautiful, joyful part of your life. You deserve it! Let’s talk about it more on social media and keep the conversation going.
ABOUT UPSTATE MARY
At Upstate Mary, we celebrate the power of plants and the beauty of self-care. Our Farm to Bedroom™ collection is designed to support pleasure and connection at every stage of life, whether you’re navigating menopause, postpartum, or simply exploring your sensuality. Formulated with organic botanicals and full-spectrum CBD, our intimacy oils and suppositories nurture your body without disrupting its natural balance.
Rediscover your pleasure with Upstate Mary.